How To Get Over Yourself…

life before death” No, don’t judge yourself by the years. You are as young as your heart feels”, says a granddaughter to her grandma couple days before her 90th birthday.

“Well, then I am already buried”, she answers…

These words struck me like lightning. Alzheimer’s is a brutal disease. It takes a healthy mind a locks it up in a dark room with no memories, no past, and no future. You are in the darkness, scared, confused, and basically almost dead.

We all make the same mistake. We think we have enough time to do or say whatever but, in reality, we don’t. Her answer keeps echoing in my mind over and over and the more I think ( I know, I should stop thinking) the more

Her answer keeps echoing in my mind over and over and the more I think ( I know, I should stop thinking) the more I realize, the death is near. Yes, it could be 50 or 100 years away but it also could just a second away. It doesn’t have to be the actual physical death, it can just be something that erases the awareness of who I am.

Of course, people are not afraid of death, they are afraid of non-existing, they are afraid of not being able to think, to feel, to relate to their surroundings.

Feeling, thinking, relating to situations, people, and surroundings is existing. You don’t actually have to die to be dead. So, when you have one of your fits about your broken nails or rush hour, of not having milk in the fridge, or that annoying co-worker, just take a deep breath. Feeling and getting angry or annoyed means that you are still alive. You are not trapped in your body not knowing who you are or who you are talking to.

When you get worked up about something, remember that how we perceive the world and people in it is not actually what is. You need to remember that everyone has their own perception of reality. Every situation has two different stories and two different realities. The world doesn’t revolve just around you.

However, life is also way too short to beat around the bush. Say what you mean. Don’t insult and be rude but be honest and true, be open-minded, and be ready to learn that what you think might not be the only way.

When we live in a narrow world of me…me…me, we put hurdles in our own growth. I don’t mean that other people should tell you what to do but I am saying that other people might have an interesting perspective. You might not agree with it but it doesn’t mean it doesn’t exist and it doesn’t mean that they do not allow you to see beyond your own narrow-minded beliefs.

Being stuck in a dark room with your own thoughts that you do not have any control over is the scariest thing in my books. Being trapped in your mind where you can’t tell what’s real and what is an illusion. Being trapped in a chaos of thoughts that don’t make any sense.  Being trapped in a vacuum of no memories – that fear alone makes me want to get over myself and my ways of looking at the world.

You do not have to like people. You do not have to agree with their choices. You do not have to do anything. Life is at your feet. You can choose any path you want. You can keep any person in your life and you can exclude any or all of them. You can make any choice you think is right. Just remember, whatever you are afraid of and whatever you are using as an excuse to not do something, it is nothing compared to being afraid of just being because you suddenly realize you have no clue who you are…

That moment when people talk to you like they know everything about you and your life but you don’t know who they are and you do not know who you are must be one of the scariest nightmares a person can live through…

So, find a way to get over yourself. Whatever it takes. Dance, listen to music, quit your job, learn a language, travel the world, get divorced, get married, rescue an animal, tell your boss to go somewhere, don’t show up for a party, tell someone you love them, buy a stranger a cup of coffee…








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About Dace

I am perfectly imperfect!

2 responses to “How To Get Over Yourself…”

  1. hafong says :

    Even though we try to see another’s point of view, it is very difficult to do because all we know is our own. To put yourself out there, to see through another’s eyes is almost impossible. But even knowing that – not everyone see as you see, not everyone think as you do helps a wee bit.


    • Dace says :

      Yes, you are absolutely right. It is sometimes very hard to be able to not just hear a different opinion but also try to understand it

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