Living On The Edge

Courtesy of Paul Kerkar

courtesy of Paul Kerkar

Have you ever wondered what that means – living on the edge? I have. We all live our lives the way we see it fit. We see all kinds of things, wonderful and awful, that other people do but, in a mean time, our reality is shaped by our beliefs on what is acceptable and what is not.

For some people, living on the edge means flying. For some – trying oriental food. For others – trying on clothes that they don’t feel comfortable wearing. For somebody else – giving a public speech.
And for some – admitting to others that they have no clue what they are doing.

It is a funny thing when you think about it – most of the people want to know what other people think or do because they do not know if whatever they (themselves) do is the right thing.

Our lives are based on our past experiences and feelings that can be explained by words using a language that we speak. When we experience something that can’t be expressed in words, we freak out. This freak out leads to an internal and/or an external search for a meaning or an explanation. There has to be someone or something that can explain whatever you feel.

What happens when there is no answer?

Living on the edge for me is just living. Yes, as simple as that. I wake up every morning not knowing or wanting to know what is going to happen because wanting to know means control. I can’t control what happens in my life. I can’t control LIFE. If I try to control, it almost always fails. When it fails, I am faced with existential questions. Questions that I can’t answer.

If you plan your day, it almost never plays out the way you want.

You think for hours about questions you will ask during your job interview. You play out all kinds of scenarios in your head about that serious conversation you will have with that one person. However, when you are having that conversation, it never goes the way you want or thought it would go.

Controlling always means safety. When you can control whatever happens, you feel safe. If you can’t control, your life becomes hectic and unpredictable.

Does living on the edge mean not having control or does that mean that you are actually living?

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About Dace

I am perfectly imperfect!

6 responses to “Living On The Edge”

  1. Kitt Crescendo says :

    I think on the edge is when outside sources conspire… Control is more of an internal thing.

    You can’t always control circumstances, but you control your reactions or your choice to see the bright side or not. To have faith or not. To be thankful to have survived bad times or to be bitter that bad times happened.

    I guess what I’m saying is that although the edge is never far away, control is always there; always a choice. Which is why choosing to give it up and entrust it to someone else who values you can be such a rush…

  2. Valentina says :

    My tweets this morning:

    “With headphones a song sounds so intensely good you just want to loop it. Next one comes, same thing. Life, man. Fight the loop, skip ahead.”

    and

    “Of course, it helps when your playlist is very varied, on shuffle, and you consistently weed out the tedious ones.”

    I believe living on the edge means being exposed, which can be tiring if it’s a permanent condition. A good shuffle of conditions as well as moods keeps you alive, vibrant and receptive. But no matter what, anything that repetitively brings you down is definitely worth getting rid of. I agree with Kit above: you cannot, (should not!) control what happens to you, but you can control how you respond to it, and who has power over you.

  3. Sue Dreamwalker says :

    We each of us live on the edge.. for no one knows what the next moments may bring..
    If we lived with certainty.. How soon would we be bored,, As we would want something to excite our lives… Great thoughts..

    • Dace says :

      Great point, Sue. “Status quo” is not something we wish for, even though majority of people state the opposite.

      People say they wish harmony, they wish peace, and they wish nothing would change, but in reality we can’t handle all that. We get bored….

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