Demolition time

Roger Waters The Wall

Roger Waters The Wall

As I am smashing my hammer against the wall I am thinking about my mother. The wall just reminded me of how much they are alike. I know, how odd is that when a wall reminds you of your mother?

Somebody some time long ago put in the half wall in the most ridiculous place. You can kind of see the reasoning but still it just doesn’t make sense. You look at the layout of the place and you keep wondering why there is this wall that almost has no purpose as just to abstract the view and complicate things.

Same way is my mother’s life. Sometime long ago somebody made her think or feel or just told her flat out – you ought to be this way. No reason, no understanding , no purpose – just be.

And so she went to develop all the characteristics of this half wall. Till this day she chooses to be the half wall in her own life and refuses to think that walls are not permanent. She refuses to remove these walls in fear that she will not live up to somebody’s expectations and will not have the purpose somebody else chose for her. However, she herself can’t explain that purpose or even knows it.

All she knows is – you ought to be this way…

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About Dace

I am perfectly imperfect!

2 responses to “Demolition time”

  1. Denise Hisey says :

    So relatable…that half wall that is my mother. As dementia now cloaks denial, it’s hard to tell where one ends and the other begins. But, I continue to grieve the fact she never did or ever will make the effort to take down the wall.

    • Dace says :

      I so hear you. I hurts to think that she could have had a good life with so much more happiness. However, it is not our lives to live and not our choices to make.

      Real life is far different from the “happily ever after” movies

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