We all have secrets! We all have things that we do not talk about! We all have memories that we wish were made up. And we have mind created memories of events that never happened.
However, what actually impresses me is that there are people who let others around them think that something is true but never make an effort to share the actual truth. Yes, sometime it is not worth even trying and sometimes there is no need.
I read a Single Dad Laughing’s compilation of What people think is true and What actually is true, and two entries caught my attention.
“Having the secret gives me power over at east something in my life”. How about leaving? How about taking charge of your own life and having a chance of being happy? How about leaving to have a chance to meet somebody who will love you and respect you? How about reaching out for help?
I don’t understand this – having an affair and staying in that relationship is helping how…? I am afraid to think what will happen when the husband finds out about this affair.
This is a good one. That made me smile and say – you go girl. Not that I support affairs with married people but we all have choices to make. Being considered a lesbian apparently is better than admitting the affair.
On the first one, your thoughts are so true! An affair doesn’t help *anything* and if her husband is truly bad and abusive, eek! Things could be pretty dire if/when he finds out!
Then again, it seems that in most relationships where there is domestic abuse, the victims very rarely actually WANT to leave, or even think they CAN… It’s very, very sad.
By: Heather Stearns on January 18, 2013
at 9:44 pm
however, if the husband is really abusive, i can’t see a woman cheating on him is she cares if she lives or dies.
By: Dace on January 18, 2013
at 10:00 pm
I can appreciate her sentiments – ‘gives me power over at least something in my life’… Not saying it’s a good thing to do however, if she is so scared of her husband perhaps she is hoping that he will discover the truth and vanquish her from his life..! She sounds as though she hasn’t the basic strength to ‘get out of the relationship’ in the traditional sense. Fear can do that to people; make them ‘less than’…. Sad..
As for the second; I’m still laughing…! What does that say about me…? However, I see the funny side to a terrible situation… Unfortunately these things have a way of ending with so many hurt…!
Great post, Dace…!
By: carolynpageabc on January 20, 2013
at 7:21 pm
“vanquish her from his life” – this scares me.
Affairs are bad only if both sides are hurting other people in there lives. However, it is still up to two people what choices they make.
By: Dace on January 20, 2013
at 7:31 pm
“vanquish her from his life” – this scares me.
What mean you…?
By: carolynpageabc on January 20, 2013
at 7:38 pm
I mean it is an actual way. In this case I am assuming that the husband could be abusive as she is afraid of him.
There are cases when it doesn’t end with both involved parties moving on and living happily ever after separately from each other.
By: Dace on January 20, 2013
at 7:51 pm
Yes, every case is different…!
Life isn’t straightforward and doesn’t always make sense.
I know I stayed in a relationship because my self esteem was so low I didn’t think I could make it on my own. Finally I got so sick (literally) the end came swiftly when he ‘discarded’ me. This was the greatest thing that could ever have happened. I didn’t have the strength to ‘get out’, and when he left I found the strength to ‘move on’… Such is life.. It’s a hotchpotch; or has been for me…! I’m on the ‘right side of the stick’ now though, Dace… A little experience, and maturity have helped..!
By: carolynpageabc on January 20, 2013
at 7:57 pm
and you are sharing your light and love with us! That was the best thing that could have happened to you – him leaving you.
By: Dace on January 20, 2013
at 8:16 pm
Thank You.. that’s sweet of you.
and,
you are so right… Best thing ever…!
By: carolynpageabc on January 20, 2013
at 8:50 pm